The Male Obsession

19 Sep

They always ask leaning in as if they’re digging for the truth about what women think and every time they are sorely disappointed with my answer. There is an immediate dismissal because my answer mustve been created to make them feel better about their size. They “Hm..” or add an “Okay” to their strained facial muscles unable to hold about their dissatisfaction. Maybe the truth isn’t as interesting as fantasy.

Men are obsessed with wanting bigger-you-know-whats. They’re bombarded with the infamous Texan motto, “Bigger is Better” through porn and ads geared to pumping them up.

I feel lucky enough my male friends speak to me in confidence about this issue. In addition to friends, every male lover I have ever had always asks about his size. “Is it really satisfying?” YES! My goodness, can’t you see how awesome I feel? In their defense, women are notorious for faking (I’m truly proud to say I can count on one hand how many times I have faked an orgasm). It would be hard to gauge if a woman was being honest with her partner.

It took me a number of years to be okay with my body size (i.e. my ass) and it was thanks to many, many men over the years assuring me my ass was awesome, and sought after, that I was able to overcome this silly paranoia I had… So I will do the same for you, men-with-an-average-sized-member, and I hope anyone else who has sex with men will also do the same because this paranoia is silly.

But it’s become a thing, hasn’t it? It’s true that some people are into large cocks but it isn’t for everyone (and personally, it’s never really been my cup of tea but was fun once in a while). There is a lot of prep work that goes into having sex with someone who is well-endowed. Things are more simple, easier with someone who is average. If penetration gets your partner off and being stretched apart by a bedpost isn’t their thing, then I wouldn’t worry about being larger to be more pleasing to them.

I always say, “When in doubt, just remember that average is average for a reason; it works!”

(BTW, it was this article that inspired my post today. I think making porn featuring your Average Joe is a fabulous idea!)

What I’m sayin’ is, “Chillax dudes. Just be attentive to your lover and don’t be afraid to speak up and explore.” And if your average size, or smaller than average size, is truly an issue for your partner then there is no need to put yourself in a situation that makes you feel bad about you. Be with someone who appreciates you.

KISS. Keep It Simple Stupid. *grins* If it isn’t simple, get out. Small tangent. Anyway, rock on with your awesome self.

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3 Responses to “The Male Obsession”

  1. Rachael September 19, 2011 at 10:59 pm #

    I love that stretched feeling! However, if you love that feeling it helps to keep your va-jay jay in shape with exercises. Since I’ve started working on being able to orgasm from penetration, I’m finding the more “in shape” I am when it comes to my lady bits, the more pleasure I get when I go to “train myself” with a toy.

    Also, Tucker Max claims to be right around average in the pants and apparently he’s slept with women numbering in the triple digits. If you read his stories you’ll see that a lot more than just his dick goes into his sex shenanigans. Which is true for the partners that a lot of women choose. Yes, some women choose men for their size, but I think that a lot of my selection process goes into who my partner is. His attitude, personality and, yes, his other physical attributes like his eyes, hands, butt, etc. are all things I take into consideration when I’m ogling potential sex partners.

    So I agree! But I agree with what you say, April. Men (an women) just need to chill out and go for the gusto because we usually wind up in bed with someone for reasons other than our body parts.

    • April Lee September 22, 2011 at 10:59 am #

      “Men (an women) just need to chill out and go for the gusto because we usually wind up in bed with someone for reasons other than our body parts.” Awww! Well said Rachel! Thanks for posting!! ^_^

  2. Amanda Papenfus September 22, 2011 at 11:32 pm #

    April…this reminds me of a convo we had backstage (ah the theater kids, such antics)…anyhow, the guys were discussing/arguing this very topic, and one of the guys said something to the effect that he thinks it’s actually the *smaller* guys who should be a prize to girls. His logic: The guy with the large dick knows he has it and thinks that’s all he has to do to be satisfying. The smaller guy, however, feels he has something to prove, and he will try that much harder to make sure the girl gets hers. Another asks what if the guy just *thinks* he’s small? The original guy says, well, he hopes that’s the problem.

    And I think that probably is for most of the guys who think they’re too small; they’re probably at least average and just feel inadequate by comparison to the large ones. Guys need to not worry about how they compare in size, and realize they’re the one you’re there with, so obviously they have something going for them. Everyone has their preferences. I happened to always be with guys who assured me my boobs aren’t too small and my butt is awesome…the guys who would have made fun of either are obviously the ones I didn’t gravitate toward, and well, their loss 😛

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