3 Jan

So here is something I’ve been thinking about:
Why is it hot to be called a slut or a whore in bed?
Why is it a turn on to be turned into a possession in bed but is clearly not okay in the regular world?

By possession I am referring to when someone says this [body part] is “mine” or my [body part] is “yours.” It gives a feeling of possessing something which leads me to think that possessing is equated with “taking.” This is what is fundamentally wrong with the way we think about it in society. It’s easier to use myself as an example in writing so I’m going to talk about it this way. When society talks about it, they say one of two things: 1) That is something I think is hot (and generally these are people in monogamous relationships) or 2) Why would anyone like that? Isn’t that degrading?

It kind of reminds of the debate between “pro-sex” feminists and more conservative ones. But that’s another chat for another day (I truly don’t get how you can be pro-feminist, pro-choice and so very degrading when talking about a slut as if she is degrading his/herself! Isn’t that contradictory? A conflict of interests?).

And why is it so damn sexy to stick a fork in it and scream, “MINE!” Perhaps it makes the ego purr and maybe that isn’t always such a bad thing. Like when someone compliments you on a job well done at work.

Maybe, what is not so good about the whole, “Your [body part] is mine” thing is that it’s often equated, “I have every right to it.” I think people tend to lose sight of the fact that it’s given. If I tell my lover my cunt is his, it’s because I am giving it to him and I am likely giving him permission to do what he wants, when he wants (or her. I’ve never had a female partner but it could happen!) but that can be taken away at any moment. No one has an all access path. Otherwise, I’d be a slave.

That’s another chat for another day. The slave fetish.

Likely, anyone who is reading this does not forget that you don’t actually own someone else. I realize I might be preaching to the choir but maybe I’m not. Maybe someone hadn’t thought of this.

Anyway, just wanted to share that thought with you today.


One Response to “Mine”

  1. Camille Mitchell March 5, 2013 at 3:25 pm #

    Hey there!

    I came across Modern Sex Culture. I really love what you have done!
    We came up with this infographic on cougar women and would really love your help spreading the word!

    Would you mind helping us out and posting on your blog?

    Here is the link to the actual page to take a look!


    Thank you again for your time,


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